Ninja Christianity

 

Last week, in an effort to incite my brothers and sisters in Christ into blatant acts of evangelism, I wrote about “one-way missionaries” who packed their belongings into their own coffins as they went off to almost certain death. I also included a quote from Charles Spurgeon about sinners going to hell only by leaping over our dead bodies with our arms wrapped around their knees.

 

Apparently some of you found this, shall we say, less than “uplifting and encouraging.” 

 

Okay, I get it. I may have been a bit heavy-handed in my approach. 

 

It’s actually understandable. 

 

Many people view evangelism as “not their calling.” 

 

It’s uncomfortable and it can backfire on you. Many people fear destroying a functional and comfortable relationship by coming off as a “religious nut case.”

So, let’s take another approach.

 

I propose that instead of thinking of yourself as a street preacher with a “REPENT! THE END IS NEAR!” sign draped around your neck, you instead think of yourself as a Christian Ninja. 

 

Now, we should be very, very clear that I am most certainly NOT advocating killing anyone at any time for any reason. Ever. The ninjas were assassins, among other things. That is not where I am going with this.

 

I am also most certainly NOT making reference to mutant cartoon turtles.

 

Real ninjas existed in feudal Japan from the 15th to the 17th century. They practiced espionage, sabotage, infiltration, and guerrilla warfare. (I’m intentionally leaving out “assassination” as I just said. This is not a perfect analogy. Work with me here.)

 

So, what I’m proposing is that we infiltrate the culture with the love and peace and joy of Jesus Christ. 

 

No, I’m not proposing that we wear black outfits and learn to sneak around at night without making a sound. 

 

Our culture is one in which over 95% of the people already believe in God. They may have a distorted view of God, but the vast, vast majority already believe God exists.

 

We are already in the culture and we already blend in. Most Christians are indistinguishable from the rest of the population. We’ve already got the stealth thing figured out.

 

We’ve also already got the espionage thing figured out. The unsaved population makes no secret whatsoever about their world-view. They broadcast it 24 hours a day, seven days a week on those noisy boxes all the furniture in their living rooms are aimed towards. Odds are, our living rooms look just like theirs. 

 

I’m proposing is that we get better at sabotage and guerrilla warfare.

 

Here’s an example:

When a friend tells you about something awful that happened to them or someone they love, instead of saying, “I will pray for you,” pray for them right then and there. 

 

This sounds really difficult, but it’s not. You already care about them, and you do truly want to ask God to help them, so it’s not that hard. Yes, there is a Biblical admonition about praying in public for your own glory, but that’s not at all what you are doing. You are not going to pray loudly, screaming “HALLELUJAH” and drawing attention to yourself. You’re really and truly showing love, care, and compassion to a friend by asking the all-powerful God of the universe to please help them. You’ve transformed yourself from someone who says they are going to pray for your friend, to someone who is actually doing it, right there in their presence. 

 

And don’t worry if your friend is saved or not. If they are saved, not only are you loving them, you are demonstrating that they can do it too. Imagine a world where believers openly pray for each other on a regular basis, even if other people may see them do so. If they are not saved, you are demonstrating not only love but bravery as well. 

 

Ninjas are brave. That part of the analogy fits.

 

Or, let’s say someone mentions “karma.” This is where you pull out your ninja sword and say, “Actually, the Bible does say that what you sow is what you reap.” The person will say, “Really?” and then you get to say, “Yes, Galatians 6:7 says, ‘Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.'” You then go on the explain that it doesn’t have anything to do with reincarnation like “karma” does, but you’ve just used the Sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God, (Ephesians 6:17) and God has promised that His Word will never come back void, because it will always accomplish what He intended. (Isaiah 55:11)

 

This means you have to keep your sword sharp by studying and memorizing the Word. Kinship Christian Radio can help with that, because the Word is mentioned and referenced all the time.

 

As you become better with your sword, you will be amazed at how many everyday occurrences have a Bible verse that applies. Soon you will be slicing and dicing with the Word like it’s a Ginsu knife. (Trivia: The word “ginsu” is a made-up word that sounds like it has something to do with ninjas but was actually made up by the inventor of the knives who later said that the meaning of the word was “I never have to work again.”) 

 

Speaking of trivia, let’s say somebody mentions ninjas. This is your opportunity to mention that, at the time actual ninjas existed, it was said that they were capable of walking on water. While this is doubtful, you now have the opportunity to talk about Jesus walking on water and rescuing Peter from his doubt. (Matthew 14:22-32)

 

But perhaps the most effective forms of sabotage and guerrilla warfare are showing love and kindness when it is least expected. 

 

I recently gave away a couple of chainsaws. They had some value, but it wasn’t an enormous amount. I was trying to sell them online when a man contacted me who asked that I give them to him for free. I said, “Sure, if you need them, you can have them.” We agreed to meet at a public place halfway between our two homes (Ninjas do not put themselves in unnecessary danger.) and then I said that I really liked the Coca Cola in bottles available at a certain restaurant which I knew was owned by a brother in Christ. I told this man that he did not have to, but if he would like to bring me a gift in exchange for the gift I was giving him, that would be really nice. I also mentioned the owners name –which gave that brother an opportunity to establish a relationship and witness to him.

 

When he arrived, he had TWO bottles of Coca Cola and he was very happy. I told him Jesus loved him and his family and said, “God bless you” as he walked to his vehicle with the chainsaws. He was all smiles. His daughter, who had seen and understood all that was taking place, looked at me like I was crazy.

 

Ninja mission accomplished!

 

In another event a couple of days prior to that, a dear sister in Christ named Sarah had made a favorable comment on a Facebook page to some coffee roasters in Florida. I also made a comment suggesting that since I knew Sarah to be a wonderful person of outstanding character that the coffee-roasting company should send her a large quantity of free coffee and the tools to make it. The coffee roasters responded by saying I seemed like “a pretty upstanding guy” and I should buy her some free coffee. 

 

So, I donned my ninja gear and said I would certainly do that! I bought Sarah a $22 bag of coffee and she was delighted. She teased me that the coffee roasters had certainly “got” me, and I replied that it may seem that I had been “got” but a dear friend was overjoyed and happy and a couple of guys in Florida trying to make an honest living had sold a bag of coffee. I ended by saying, “…when life is not all about me, it’s all good.” (See the guerrilla warfare of sneaking a Christian precept in there?)

 

The conversation continued on as others joined in and even the coffee guys used the word “love” to describe the conversation. Sarah then mentioned going on a mission trip, to which I replied, “I will go where the Lord sends me!” 

 

And yet another ninja mission was accomplished! 

 

In this world where God has promised that light will overcome darkness, we do not have to sneak around like ninjas in the dark. We can boldly love one another and the Holy Spirit will present opportunities for us to witness by acts of kindness and love. The same Holy Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead will give us the words and the courage to engage in acts that sabotage the enemy’s plans for hatred and evil. We don’t need nunchucks and shurikens when we have the Word of God and the love of Jesus Christ. 

 

And if you think about it, the ultimate ninja was Jesus. By his death and resurrection, He sabotaged the devil’s plans to destroy us all. Not even His closest friends saw it coming, even though He clearly and plainly told them it would take place. His love won out in the guerrilla war for our souls, not on a conventional battlefield, but on a hill called “The Place of the Skull” and in a graveyard where a tomb sat empty.

 

Today’s Praise

By this is love perfected with us, so that we may have confidence for the day of judgment, because as he is so also are we in this world. 1 John 4:17

Written by Dan Jones