{"id":2201,"date":"2017-12-14T03:28:30","date_gmt":"2017-12-14T03:28:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kinshipradio.org\/home\/2017\/12\/14\/the-disturbing-christian\/"},"modified":"2017-12-14T03:28:30","modified_gmt":"2017-12-14T03:28:30","slug":"the-disturbing-christian","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kinshipradio.org\/home\/the-disturbing-christian\/","title":{"rendered":"The Disturbing Christian"},"content":{"rendered":"

by Dan Jones<\/span><\/p>\n

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\n<\/span>There’s an old Monty Python skit I told Allen Jones and Beth Crosby I had an urge to “modify” for Kinship Christian Radio, so here goes:<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Announcer: It’s a beautiful spring day on the patio outside the Golden Calf Restaurant. Bob and Bobbie Smythe-Curry are each enjoying a refreshing glass of ice tea.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: It certainly is a beautiful spring day, isn’t it dear?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: Oh, I should say so. It’s like that day in Fargo all over again.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: Yes. Yes I should say so.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: Oh look, dear, it appears that poor man over there has no where to sit.\u00a0<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: Yes, well, I’m sure a table will open up for him soon.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: But his ice cream is melting and he’s carrying that huge book. Let’s invite him to sit with us!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: Well, ummm, I’m not sure. He could be….you know.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: Oh please, dear.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob. Well, all right then. You there, sir. You with the book, please come and join us.\u00a0<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: Me? Are you talking to me?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: Yes, yes please come and join us.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: Are you sure? I won’t be disturbing you?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: No, please. Please come and join us.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: Well, hallelujah! Thank you so very much.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>(Sound of chair sliding back. The man sighs as he sits down)<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: Praise God! So very nice to meet you both! Now, you’re sure I won’t be disturbing you in the least?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: No, no! Not in the least!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: Because I wouldn’t want to be disturbing, especially when you’re being so kind (Praise God!) about not being disturbed and all.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: No, no. It’s quite all right.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: Good, good! HALLELUJAH! Because you know, I am a Christian, and, well, some people take offense…and when I specifically tell people that I am disturbing, well, \u00a0a lot of them are far less understanding than you are.\u00a0<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: You’re a ….a Christian?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: Yes! PRAISE GOD!\u00a0<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: Oh, you mean like an actual Christian<\/i>?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: Right. Born again! Rescued for His glory! AMEN! HALLELUJAH!…I’m sorry did that disturb you?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: No, I guess not. It’s not actually all that disturbing…<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: No, no! It’s not! It’s glorious! Really! HALLELUJAH!! PRAISE JESUS!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie. (shocked) Oh!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: Oh my indeed.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: And if I should start to read aloud from my Bible, I really do get the most extraordinary looks… “For GOD so LOVED the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that WHOSOEVER would…”<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: Perhaps we should be going, dear. We wouldn’t want to be late for that…errr…thing we have, right dear?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: (Dejectedly) Oh, now I have gone and disturbed you, haven’t I? I knew it. People say they won’t be disturbed, but it always happens. Just when I think I’m being an effective witness…<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: Oh, now you’ve hurt his feelings, Bob. Let’s stay.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: Right, right. Well I suppose….But we really do have a thing. Later, I mean.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: You’re very kind. HALLELUJAH!! PRAISE THE LORD! HALLELUJAH!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: Hallelujah!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: Really dear?<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: HALLELUJAH!! JESUS IS LORD!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: It’s kind of contagious, Bob.<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: GLORY TO GOD IN THE HIGHEST!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: HALLELUJAH!!<\/span>
\n
\n<\/span>Bob: Hallelujah!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Man: …that WHOSOEVER would believe would NOT PERISH but would have ETERNAL LIFE!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bob: HALLELUJAH!<\/span>
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\n<\/span>Bobbie: PRAISE JESUS! HALLELUJAH!<\/span>
\n
\n<\/span>Today’s Praise<\/span>
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\n<\/span>“Paul and Silas have caused trouble all over the world,” they shouted, “and now they are here disturbing our city, too. (Acts 17:6b NLT)<\/i><\/span><\/span>
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\n<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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